WeBeJeepin’ Moab

Ahhhh, the evil blogger is released! After several informative yet somewhat vanilla trail reports, the time is right for some nitty, gritty red dirt! AND………..the target for the day is………….Melanie. HURRAH!

Consider the trail, Moab Rim………and consider the driver, Melanie, in her JK Rubicon. Now, think of every big scary you’ve ever had, every nightmare filled with creepy crawlies, childhood monsters under the bed, wet pants and pucker factors. Now, you begin to understand the fear that Melanie has of………the Moab Rim. Fear, like fine wine, develops over time and Melanie had, in her past before we knew her, had a bad experience on this trail and had been diagnosed with what we call “post-traumatic rockcrawling syndrome”, PTRS.

I won’t say that Melanie is a pansy, she is a girly-girl at times but that’s okay. I will say that this trail has been on her radar screen at least 3 times and she’s used every excuse to cancel. Flimsy things like…..”I’m in the hospital”, “I have to work”, “It’s too cold, there’s ice on the slickrock”. Her latest was….”my rear locker is stuck”. Well, lockers are a good thing so get your A** up there! The only way to cure PTRS is to drive the trail again. So, she did. Today, is her tale…….

How beautiful the Portal is today as we see the line of rigs working their way up. Melanie made it handily up the Devil’s Crack. I think there was an audible sigh of relief echoing through the canyon.

Next, was the Z turns. By the time I took this photo, she was already up. Did I mention that she was my shadow? You know how your Mom used to say, “if Johnny jumped off a cliff, would you”. I think if I drove off the cliff, Melanie would have come with me, she was watching my line so closely. A couple of times I looked in my rearview and saw her eyeball filling the mirror!

Here we are at the top of the Rim, working our way over to tire test hill. The group is having fun here, few realize the terror developing in Melanie. Yeah, she’s at the top now but what happens when she has to go down?

Here we are at our hike to the Indian fort. It requires a climb up a narrow crack to get to the circle of stones. Not sure if this is authentic or if the boy scouts built it. Either way, it’s a nice way to stretch your legs.

Here’s our star of the show! After the drive up the Rim, this climb is child’s play. Luckily by this time, her pants look dry. She tried to blame it on sweat and the heat of the day. Whatever Melanie, always wear BROWN shorts on a scary trail day!

Next we checked out the petroglyph panels. Here are the dancing, happy Kokopellis! They distracted Mel and made her laugh……..for the moment.

Here’s Melanie trying to go up the sandhill. She really had the sand flying and made it the farthest up (for a Jeep that is). Today, the kings and queen of the sandhill were the lightweight Sammy’s with big tires. All of the Jeeps looked up in envy but we pretended we didn’t care. Here’s some news for you, “oh yes, we care”!

Jeff, you’re going to be building buggies for the next 10 years if you don’t stop showing us how great your creations are. Oh well, we’ll struggle on……somehow.

After a stop for lunch, it was back to Melanie’s nightmare! Now honestly, does this look scary? How beautiful is this picture with Susan driving tranquilly through the idyllic countryside? Susan’s not scared of this trail in spite of a serious roll-over on the Devil’s Crack a few years back.

Here’s Melanie descending the Z turn, the site of many a flip, roll, and bloody agonizing death. (Okay, just kidding about the last part.) When you look at this picture, you have to imagine the piercing scream coming from the driver’s seat. Now, what do you think comes next????

Nothing! Mel made it, no problem.

But, next is the Devil’s Crack. How many times has she heard the story of Susan’s roll-over here on this very obstacle? Such a roll over that Susan had to drive back up the obstacle as the ledge was too narrow to turn around. With the cliff just to the side, this is pretty intimidating. I hope her brakes work okay!

 Oh…….good. Brakes aren’t needed. The front bumper making solid contact with the slickrock stopped the Jeep completely. Nice work Melanie.

Okay, now what?              Stuck?               Stuck?             Don’t leave me Ralphy, don’t leave me!!!

Don’t worry, Jim is here to stack rocks!

Well, like all good stories, all’s well that ends well. Melanie and the rest of the group did the trail, no trouble. Ber even drove down with no front brakes!

Now, just for the record, Melanie is a good friend of mine and I’m sure the cell phone will be ringing with her giving me a piece of her mind for featuring her in the blog.

Here’s my last thought for this report. Melanie is a great driver, she’s conquered her fear of the Rim and she’s ready for tougher stuff. She’s a true off-roader and a valued member of the club. That’s why I know she’ll forgive my poetic license with her story! (It’s CLOSE to being absolutely true!)

Another great day and a very Happy 4th of July! See ya on the trail!

Trail Reports